FakeJonathan Twitter Updates

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Back in the Saddle


I am happy to announce that I'm back at the blogger desk and ready to keep you up to date here with my uncensored thoughts. With business tanking like it is, the constant eternal sunshine that I have to put out on my corporate blog is giving me migraines.

But before I start dishing the dirt, I guess I should explain why I went away for so long. The long and short of it is that I was just plain afraid of getting fired.

The board was putting the hints out, you know? Little shit like, "Oh Jonathan, we don't care what you do with the stock moniker or that your reverse split business, but Christ, what is the fucking deal with that secret diary shit?"

OK, so I caved. So sue me.

Thing is, I had a revelation this 4th of July. Sun stock was tanking so rapidly I thought it was going to go back to the price we had before the reverse split. I even polished up my resume thinking the board was going to shitcan me for sure.

But it didn't happen. Fact is, these dumbfucks think I'm the only thing that can save the company from this dogshit economy.

The mind boggles. Then again, even George Bush got a second term.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wonderful....I'd like to personally cut his ponytail off. The guy hasn't done a damm thing other than cash a check and roll out a RIF every quarter or more. Bring back Scooter....

Fake Scott said...

Thanks Anonymous, I really appreciate your comment (send me your resumé, I'll see what I can do for you).

Jonathan, I'm happy to see you here again, not only blogging those boring articles in the corporate page.
Anyhow, don't worry about your job, I personally care about you in the backstage (is quite comforting to have you in the frontline, someone to blame when things go bad, instead of me ;-) ).
Really happy to see you back, kiddo.

Scooter.

Steve Ballmer said...

Welcome back!

 
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